My Feelings -Broken Hearted- (Part XIX)

Maybe it’ll be easy to write up.

Basically she fell in love with this guy and he broke her heart.

Twice.

Now she’s going out with some people.

Though I think it’s just Ryan.

Now this new guy, what a twat.

He gave her flowers as soon as she got in the car.

Makes me look and feel bad.

I was supposed to be the one for her.

But I guess thats now gone.

She gets to go out on all these dates and see all these guys.

If I went to see a girl, she’d flip her lid and would never speak to me in a long time.

I don’t want that tbh.

I want her.

By the looks of it, i’ll never have her again.

She said she was single and not looking.

That’s now down the drain.

This is how I feel.

This is how I’ve been feeling for awhile now.

I had plans to get back with her and propose to her properly

Like she always wanted.

On October 11th 2008.

Then we could properly start our future.

Three kids.

A house.

Wedding, the lot.

It’s fading away now.

These have been my plans for a long time now.

Ever since that “fiasco”, everything went tits up.

Then every other lad…

..I haven’t had the chance.

Maybe she doesn’t need to know how I feel.

She already knows.

If she loves me as much as she says so, then why does she have to be with these other lads?

I’m always alone.

I get a little heartbroken when she goes out.

But I’ll live.

Maybe I should just be another heartless freak.

I need her more than anything in this whole wide world.

There’s so much more to tell.

To share.

But it hurts.

Like a deep wound.

That will be just another scar.

Always reminding me of everything.